For human beings that decide to take themselves on and embark on a personal and/or spiritual growth journey it can be a trying time for lots of reasons.
Very often in life we get pissed off with the people in our life when they continue to treat us as we were, perhaps even as a teenager, without them noticing the changes that have taken place within us.
However its not their fault. Most likely we have expected those people to just ‘get it’ ‘get us’ without taking the time to properly enrol them into who the new us is, and what the new us are wanting to achieve.
If we take the time to have those conversations it will pay off with dividends.
Another great way to improve your relationships is showing up with integrity and taking 100% responsibility.
We all tend to view relationships as 50/50, and if someone does or says something to upset us, we expect them to make the first move and apologise. When this doesn’t happen we feel indignant, and the need to be right and justified often leads to strained relationships and uncomfortable conversations.
If we can take 100% responsibility (as long as we are protecting ourselves and don’t have porous boundaries) and show up in conversations with the people in our life explaining why we have ‘been an asshole’ we can lower their defences and create a captive audience to the conversation.
You might think this sounds weird and counter intuitive especially if someone has upset us. However people usually upset us because they are upset about something themselves, and the merry go round continues where nobody talks, potentially for years.
If you can have that conversation taking 100% responsibility and showing up with integrity, the other very often will reciprocate and show up in the same way. Can you imagine the vulnerable space you just created which allowed for a completely different conversation, and a completely different result?
Life changing, and relationships getting back to where you want them, in a much more positive place.
Being happy has got to be worth more to you than being right.
If you want to know more about Mel Clarke, she is also a Life Purpose Coach & Reiki Healer helping people come out of chaos to live guilt free and find their purpose driven direction in life.
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